Motherhood

I have wanted to write this blog since mother's day but I haven't gotten a chance until now. Both girls are fast asleep and I am feeling inspired to write.
Most of you know that I became a mom very young and in different circumstances than I had always planned, yet in Gods grace I welcomed it with open arms and fell in love not only with my new baby boy but with being a mom. I spent many mothers day a single mom but happy I was always guaranteed to have Justus with me on the special day. That in itself was a perfect mothers day. But, the years went on and I now have three beautiful children to mother. 
My mothers day this year wasn't exactly hallmark perfect. I tried to sleep in but couldn't. Aaron, bless his heart, tried to let me sleep in but I could hear my normally happy, round baby fussing and the motherly instincts in me carried me up and out of bed before I could stop myself. My girls were fussy and I was wanting to spend time with everyone and feeling pulled in all different directions.
 I am ashamed to say that up until this mothers day I fell into the trap that mothers day was about me (and my mom & grandma) and what I wanted to do that day. I was caught up in having the perfect day like everyone says we should have or we deserve. Boy was I wrong! 
Aaron announced to me that he was overwhelmed with a project for school so he couldn't accompany us to church, and that he had to do homework ALL DAY. I secretly was mad at him even though I knew he couldn't help it. I was even more upset when I got to church and I realized that the sermon was perfect for us yet only I was going to hear it. I called Aaron during worship and told him he needed to get the tape. I know that's terrible but I was feeling alone and frustrated on the one day everything is suppose to go perfect. The day went on...
We got home and the girls took a nap. I desperately wanted  some quiet restful time but I knew that Justus would be all alone left to resort to some kind of media if I rested. I spent time with him instead and enjoyed every minute of it.
It was cold outside and I wanted to take a walk, but we couldn't. I wanted to have a day free of cooking but we couldn't afford to go out to eat. sigh. 
I started feeling sorry for myself and wishing this entire day was different and I was feeling like I hated Mothers Day and why do we have it anyway?
I must have sat still long enough for the Lord to speak and I sat still long enough to hear his sweet, gracious, and loving voice.
Is it really about you Shannon? Motherhood? Is it about you or the kids I have entrusted to you to love and guide and care for? Humiliated with myself, I said, No Lord its not.
God has a way of making such a complex and vast concept so clear and evident in one single moment.
That was my moment!
Motherhood is anything but perfect, but that is the beauty of it.
I have stretch marks, sags, wrinkles, grey hairs (yes I have found some recently:( ), lack of sleep, overwhelming days, and me is the last on my daily list. There is beauty in that.
We are privileged to put band aids on boo boos that don't really need them, honored to wipe green boogies and nasty poops, and blessed to have children who look up at us with bright eyes filled with love for us no matter how many flaws we have.
We live in a society that tells us we need to get a lot of time to ourselves, accomplish grate things in the world, or make a lot of money. But if you have chosen the road of motherhood, its NOT!
I know you need to enjoy and live life as I do. I just choose to do it at times that they are sleeping, enjoying family, or I am with them! Its a constant juggling and adventure but its doable.
In all of the hard times, there is a beauty and joy that could not be found in anything but Motherhood. 
I have so much to be grateful for and this journey is a beautiful one that I would not trade for anything or any amount of money.
I know mothers day is long gone for the cards but it is always a mothers day when you have children. Be encouraged that you can overcome any hardship that comes your way, be strong and courageous, and serve God when you serve your children. 
So, the next time you get caught up in not feeling beautiful remember there is always beauty in Motherhood. 




I have been blessed to have a mother who has been an incredible example of what a mother is, and my two sisters are great examples too!

Here are some more pictures of the mother's in my life that inspire me or teach my about mother hood in one way or another.

My precious Mother in Law

My lovely grandma GG

And wonderful Friends

Thank you all for your beauty!

Lilly's & Stellas 1st time to Disneyland!

I wanted to wait to take Lilly to Disneyland until she was able to get excited and anticipate going! It was well worth the wait!!! I made the mistake of telling her a week before it was planned thinking it would build excitement, and it did. But, drove me crazy in the mean time. She asked about 10 times a day when we were going to Disneyland where Minnie Mouse and the princessess live? Aaron, Justus, and I get so much joy from watching Lilly live life and this was one of those memorable moments watching her take in every momenet. Her bright green eyes pull you in to her adventures the minute you lock eyes with them, and all three of us love to join her world. 

She went on Dumbo in which she loved/hated and daddy got to have that experience with her. I got the privilage of taking her on the Goofy roller coaster in which she got scarrrrreeed and told me she wanted off, but then asked to go again...girls.

I was so excited to take her and Stella on Its a small World but my dreams of us all singing and enjoying it together came to a fast hault. Who would have known that it would scare those bright green eyes black along with Stella jumping into my arms for comfort. Aaron and I spent the entire ride consoling the two of them. Constantly telling Lilly they were "fake" dolls that were just singing and dancing. You would have thought she saw that old doll CHUCKIE from the horror fims.We got brief brakes when Aerial or any other familiar character caught Lilly's attention. Justus laid on the bench for the ride and told me to wake him up when it was over. I think it horrified him too:) 

It was a fun day that ended with walking through Tinker Bells garden and a trip to McDonalds. It was a gift from a friend to go and we all were blessed by going.

Aaron John

I never want him to get looked over for he plays so many roles and does an amazing job at them. Some of you who are reading this may not know him or you may fall into the category where you know him but rarely get to have any form of communication with him...email/facebook/cell/text/Skype. 

You would think in the world we live in with multiple ways to communicate he would like one of them, but He doesnt. He prefers to have conversations face to face and with his scedule or geographical reasons thats hard to get.

I dont know how he does it. He works two jobs (teaching high school at risk kids/ home & hospital teacher), is finishing grad school, helps with the house chores, helps with cooking, helps with the kids, plays with the kids, works out, and he loves to read. Lately, he's been into long distance running too. Aaron really looks forward to our summers as he gets more time with us, time to surf, and rest and recoup for the next school year.

He starts every morning with reading his Bible, a cup of coffee, his journal, and prayer (Just like my mother in law:). Sometimes he only has 3 minutes to do this and other times he'll do it for at least an hour. He gives all he can and then some more.

God really knew what he was doing when he gave me this wonderful man who continues to grow every year. I am so thankful for him and I know he is easily overlooked because of our 3 amazing kids. 

So, every now and then, I want to write about him and acknowledge his part and strength in our family.